I Get Tounge Tied

QUIRKY: compassionate, curious, deviant, different, a bit eccentric, exceptional, extraordinary, funny, kind-hearted, off-key, kinda peculiar, queer, quirky, strange, unconventional, unique, unorthodox, maybe unusual...JUST ME

Saturday, September 30, 2006

Coda - Lyrics - Sponsee - Oh Yeah!




I go to Coda..I've been going for almost two and a half years! I used to have a stigma about Coda/co-dependents blah blah blah..but I was sick, my soul was dying, I was a shadow of my self, and as a last ditch effort, I went.

And I am so happy and grateful that I did. About 18 months in, a young woman asked me to be her sponsee..and thus our killer friendship began! It's like being a mentor (I am 16 yrs older than her) and I get so much out of the relationship!
We meet weekly, send emails back and forth to one another and becasue I am a bit on the quirky side, I send her song lyrics often.

Certain songs speak to me, speak to that place in me that needs a bit of attention, sunshine and warmth..I could go on and on, but I'll shut it for a bit and just add some of the emails we have shared together.
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Upon sending her the lyrics to
"Blue Light"by Bloc Party I wrote:

"These songs are just KILLING me..I mean, like fucking Oxygen!
Like water..like pure love joy the best sunset you have ever witnessed!
I am So glad you love them too! "

"Blue Light"

You'll find it hiding in shadows
You'll find it hiding in cupboards
It will walk you home safe every night
It will help you remember

If that's way it is
Then that's the way it is

I still feel you and the taste of cigarettes
What could I ever run to
Just tell me it's tearing you apart
Just tell me you cannot sleep

And you didn't even notice
When the sky turned blue
And you couldn't tell the difference
Between me and you
And I nearly didn't notice
The gentlest feeling

You are the bluest light

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Eariler this summer, my sponsee was having a very very hard time with her best friend who was diving into the world of speed use, so I asked her to to write a letter (a letter that we both knew would not be sent so she could really GO there and not worry about feelings on the receivig side). I read the letter and was floored! It was so powerful, heartful and painful too.

My response was as follows:
"
WOW..I am speechless and overwhelmed with emotion..YOU really have a gift with writing your words/thoughts/emotions..but that is not what we are here to talk about you and I..
we are here to discuss You..your feelings, your emotions and continue to experience possibilities for you, in this new life of yours..
So, I ask, how did it feel to write this letter? How did it feel to be this honest? What comes up for you around you?
Do you think this exercises helped you get to places where you couldn't? Did it assist you in being real? Having integrity? Being Big? Just thoughts to ponder..
I love you and I am SO Proud of You"

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